Friday, March 10, 2017

I'd Like To Introduce You to The Voices In My Head

I stopped writing my blog because I had only one or two readers. I realized today that I still have to take to the page and express myself regardless because going crazy is a legitimate fear today.  Lately, what has become more obvious to me, are the voices in my head. They were wrecking me.

Upon thorough investigation I discovered some of the many voices; there are many. Let me introduce you:

Ms. Fixit - Ms. Fixit knows all the problems and she is very busy with solutions. She has some really great ideas, but she also has a tendency to repeat herself ad infnitum. She is really smart and when there is a lull in the action she feels compelled to open the files and fixit.

Ms. Yeah-But:  Yeah-But is very intrusive. When I finally convince myself that everything is all right, this minute and it's okay to relax and take a break, she chimes in. "Yeah, but what about your car, you know you need tires." "Yeah, you may have a little money in the bank right now, but what about next week?"  "Yeah, you might be able to sell the house, but what if you can't and it goes into foreclosure and you are homeless?"

Ms. Defense Attorney.  She is a real ally, but again constant noisy companion. Ms. Defense Attorney defends me against any and all accusations against my character. Nasty things people may say to or about me or accuse me of which inherently aren't true and I know it. She is continuously in court, in front of the judge proving how innocent I am

Ms. Failure - Ms. Failure keeps a running  tally of what I have not done, all the things I tried to do and failed. She is also good at comparing me to others who have achieved so much more than I.

Ms. Fatal - Ms. Fatal keeps me appraised of all the diseases I probably have. Even if it's just a headache Ms. Fatal has me in Hospice. She also uses death as a solution to my discomfort as she talks about meteors hitting the earth, heart attacks, bridges collapsing, but mostly heart attacks.

Ms. Scardy Pants _ Ms. Scardy Pants is frightened. She is the keeper of the PTSD response. She is triggered by sound. Sounds of phone ringing, txt msgs, cars in the driveway, and emails and regular mail. She is afraid of whatever is pending in my life.

Ms. Delusions of Granduer - Oh, the Grand lady of the Occipital Lobe though she is fading she does rise to the occasion, especially after I smoke a joint. My dreams of a Feminine revolution where Mothers and Children come first is a recurring theme in her domain. She is where my idea for Breasts Not Bombs came from and did become a reality. I love Mdm Grandeur, but as I get older I hear less from her.

In having dialogue with these very real characters, aspects, and personalities I have found some relief. Identifying who's got the mic. has been a revelation to my higher, better smarter self who believes that everything really is ok.

I have to appreciate Ms. Fixit and tell her what a good job she is doing and how many things she's fixed already. I have to tell Ms. Yeah-But that while her concerns are valid we really don't know what will happen next and being optimistic is help full. I have to tell Ms. Defense attorney that the Jury, after only moments in deliberation, find me Innocent. I have to tell Ms. Failure about all my accomplishments over the last 56 years.  I have to tell Ms. Fatal that it's time to take some Cayenne, Aloe, eat some protein, watch some comedy or write some. I have to tell Ms. Scardy pants that is ok to be scared and just stroke her head softly and get her a tissue when she cries. I have to tell Ms. Delusions that all her dreams can come true on the page in a novel or screenplay form.

Then, I have to activate the good voices in my head in constant response to these chatterboxes. I have to engage my Boom Chakra Lakra and fill in the blanks of

I  AM   ________________
I FEEL ________________
I WILL ________________
I LOVE ________________
I SPEAK ________________
I SEE      ________________
I KNOW________________

Then I pick up the phone and call a friend because it's comforting knowing the voice in my head is coming out of the phone and this voice....loves me very much.

These exercises and others are available in THE FIRST PRACTICAL HANDBOOK FOR CRAZY PEOPLE - How To Make The Best Of Mental Illness Available on and soon to be released in Audio format.

Friday, January 13, 2017

Climate changer

We've had some bodacious storms in Northern California over the last week. One of them blew our electricity and we spent a healthy 24 hours unplugged. It was quiet. I like candlelight/radio with a wild wind chaser.

It made me feel calm resting in the eye of the storm. In fact I never get angry at natural disasters. I don't curse the wind or rain or fire or quake. I just stand back and witness the awe-some power unleashed in a storm. Earth upended, water breaking banks, fire raging, It's nature.

 When I contemplate my ultimate demise, or death, I have submitted my request to the powers that be that nature is my executioner. So quick and merciful. Lightning striking, earthquake swallowing, flood drowning, it all works for me.

But a slow, torturous death at the hands of man or man made cancer, no thanks. I just hope I drop dead. Lately, I've been contemplating the possibilities as I'm 56 and I find under the political circumstances difficult to look forward. My career has come to a standstill, my book isn't selling, my industry is constipated and the Civil rights progress of the last 50 years is about to vanish into the thin air of white supremacy and privelege.

It's the man made destruction that drives me insane. Whether it's a toxic assault on the environment or  viscous attacks on a vulnerable population I just don't understand why this is the norm. People do try to explain it to me. Still I am angry. I'm fucking furious at the shit-show of the coming Frump administration.

The juxtaposition of President Obama's elegant and intelligent farewell speech on Tuesday Night and Donald Dump's 1st Press Conference on Wednesday morning (preceded by a sprinkle of showers) was a very clear delineation of what we are facing. I'm not going to say for the "next four years" because I truly do not believe he will even be inaugurated. I'm still enjoying denial and the possibility that someone will, at the last momen,t diagnose this miscreant with Mental Psychosis and have him committed on a 51/50 as a danger to others. (380 million Americans)

The warmth in the arena President Obama's Farewell was felt throughout the cosmos. His knowledge of the law and democracy and the ingenuity of young Americans was inspiring to me. He is a good father and husband and a great basketball player and his taste in Music is Supreme.

He turned the White house Black 
and I for one am great full.
He put the soul into it.

Many on the extreme left are also quick to point out to me the terrible misgivings and errors of America's first Black President from drone strikes to wars in 7 countries and the fact that he didn't deschedule Cannabis. Yeah, I know. I get it. BUT, I admire, respect and actually love that man and his family.

I too, can't figure out why he could not or did not do all the things on MY list. Some say it was because they would kill him and his family if he veered to far outside the lines of prescribed government. Still, I grieve any innocent lives taken by the U.S. military or drone program and I'm sorry.

However,  I know without a doubt,  for the past 8 years when I went to sleep at night I felt like there was a competent pilot on the plane and odds are I would wake up in the morning and we'd have landed safely and things would be recognizable. If Humpty Trumpty comes to power I can guarantee that will change. I don't know what he'll be tweeting in the night and who will be insulted, rejected, or arrested because he just doesn't fucking like them. There is an ice chill blowing through our democracy and his cold steely countenance is freezy with ignorance and stupidty. There is nothing kind, compassionate or here. The evidence is clear

He's a Climate Changer.

It appears, by his press conference, that he really does not comprehend the 1st amendment. I bet if you stopped him on the street tonight and asked him what it was he might be able to name 2 out of the 4 freedoms listed therein.

And somebody please tell me Where the fuck was the electoral college who's clear duty was to be  "a safeguard against the election of an unqualified demagogue or a president that might be indebted to foreign nations". Why didn't they rise up? Especially after all the hype that they had all kinds of defectors, but when it came to the know.

As much as I cling to the denial I'm in, I'm afraid he will be inaugurated (or not, probably) and then I think "well maybe the Senate will not confirm any or at least very few of his self-serving billionaire swamp hoppers to his cabinet", but then I remember. POLITICIANS NEVER FUCKING DO ANYTHING RIGHT...EVER  Obama has THE RIGHT to appoint Merrick Garland to the Supreme Court before he goes, or deschedule Cannabis or Free Leonard Peltier all that could happen, and in the past I would be in the street and on the phone trying to make it happen, but not today because I know it won't. Obama's gonna do what Obama wants to do in the next 8 days and then Things will go the way of Trump because that's what's going to happen and there is no stopping it. (Unless there's a miracle)

I've haven't even allowed myself to utter or write down the names of the alabaster elite being appointed to his cabinet (Is it a China Cabinet?) These Dough boys white as the driven snow and right wing doesn't even come close to how far on the spectrum these goons get off.

Greed is always a go to answer for men's selfish behavior. I'm afraid it's more than that. I believe there is an inherent cruelty afoot. Cruelty, ignorance, and Ego all bathed in Golden Showers.

Wednesday, December 7, 2016

Gaining Weight

Heavy times.

We, my friends, are at a cross roads. Life will never be the same after January. Everything we have fought for and even taken for granted, taken as a given, may shift. I am a wreck about it. My thoughts are rifled with terror, rage and disbelief. I can hardly glance at the news for the images of dark and evil men. White Men. So old, they're Reptilian. Cold Blooded types.Those men who care for none and believe that they can control our earth, our bodies, our reproductive organs. Them with their flacid pricks a bunch of dicks with sagging grey and smelly scrotum. Sorry, just had to spew that. It doesn't mean I'm crazy. Or does it?

Here's my theory:

This Man X Reptilian species gorges on the blood of the earth; OIL. They are part dinosaur. It was one of the earliest accounts of bestiality and a mixed race was born. These are their descendants. They will stop at nothing to drink the bloody oil. Vampire Reptilians.

But the reality is they are almost extinct (and they can't stand the light) because they are such Morons that they will bring us to the brink, but those of us with kind compassion and survival skills will bring it back. Mother Nature will help.

I'm having delusions of sanctuary cities and refugee villages and housing projects. Come Unity.

BUILD THAT WALL. I'm talking about a wall on the East Coasts of Washington, Oregon and California. Let's unite with Mexico! We get along, we work together. Yes, the states that legalized Cannabis let's get together and volunteer to build the wall with bricks of hemp and become a BlueGreen country


I want to live there with the kind folk. The ones who care. I don't care what they care about, but they gotta care about something and due unto others as they would have done unto them.
That's crazy to think there could be a place like that...but...There could!

Meanwhile, it's freezing outside and wet too. I think about the Standing Rock Sioux and all the Water Protectors with them enduring this frozen blizzard I bless and thank them from the bottom of my heart.

This is real People. This is not a test. Are you ready to rock and roll yourself into action? If you are despairing, and I know we all are, Action is the Antidote to Despair. So says Joan Baez.

Another antidote for despair for me is to eat. Yes, I find it entirely comforting to cook for myself the most robust, delectable, cuisine I can conjure. I'm a very good cook and my Kitchen Witch is very Helpfull. (A kitchen witch is the spirit in the Kitchen that guides my hands to the cupboards for ingredients) I call her Kitchy.

Goat cheese and dates. Omlettes with Fresh Arugala. Strawberry Hemp granola with dried cherries, A nice piece of Rye Toast with butta. Though, I'm not exactly binging, this diet is rich and fattening. I am fattening along side. Not only is my belly inflating, but my boobies are blooming as well. I'm heavy. Heavy with grief and hope and madness. I'm living large. I just don't fit.

Am I crazy.? Yes I am. Totally bat shit crazy. But I'm making the best of it. For it is true THEY have succeeded in driving me insane because none of this should be happening. It's a crime and a shame. And I'm going to use that frantic and panicky energy to speak my mind to allow the inner demons to run free so I'm able to face the real demons.

I can tell the difference between angels and demons. Angels  make it better. Demons make it worse. It's that simple.

I use comedy as an anti-depressant.
It makes me feel better.

Check out my comedy/exorcism here: Sherry Glaser as Mother Superior

For more helpful hints on Making the Best Of Mental Illness please buy, or download the book that I wrote with my mother before she passed away. It will help. I promise. She named it perfectly: THE FIRST PRACTICAL HANDBOOK FOR CRAZY PEOPLE.

Think I'll cook up some salmon and garlic fries with a side of broccoli. Yeah...that sounds perfect. Stay in touch....

Monday, November 14, 2016

What's Normal? Have I gone Mad?

Hello friends

I find myself ranting in the full taurus moon light. The werewolf rising in me the furious volcano of righteous rage seeking a target, but alas all I have is this page.

Trying to act normal is exhausting. Luckily I had to listen to the audio Version of The First Practical Handbook for crazy people written by mother and me. I tell ya it really helped.

The only particular instruction that really caught my eye was the mirror exercise. If you are in need of confirmation, comfort, or a friendly face; go to the mirror and look into your own eyes and tell yourself


I'm about to upload the audio version of the book on Audible. May it's wisdom and comfort be far reaching.

The First Practical Handbook For Crazy People
Making the Best of Mental Illness
Shelly and Sherry Glaser (Mother and Daughter)

Monday, October 10, 2016

The Mighty Worrier

It's been a little while since I posted because, hell, nobody reads my blog. But I decided to return to the page today as an exercise in Mental Health for #WorldMentalHealthDay I couldn't think of a better way to celebrate after the Menacing madness of Donald Dump at the Prez Debate in St. Louis last night. I will admit that Hillary often looks a bit mad herself. Her maniacal smile reminds me of my mom when she was at her manic-est. So though I find Hillary the only human choice to be the next president (and she's definitely qualified for the job) it's scary, but I love her. Just like my mom.

I've been finding myself quite a bit worried lately. Actually I've been worried for the last 54 years. I'm 56. I realized that worrying has given me nothing but heartache and stomachache. Worrying is the constant buzz around this always unpredictable life especially growing up in a mentally unstable household, but now I'm grown up and I know better but the MIGHTY WORRIER does not. She is still in full tilt boogie, when I wake up in the morning and when I close my eyes at night. Last night I drew her.

She's obviously very unhappy. She's super heavy. She's a drag. She doesn't have any feet so she can't move. All she does is obsessively nag me about what MIGHT HAPPEN. She really doesn't know and rarely is she right about her predictions. In fact the worst things that have happened to me in life, she had no idea were coming. So now that we've officially met, me and the MIGHTY WORRIER, I had to ask her...WHAT DO YOU WANT?

I asked her this a couple of days ago when I was taking my daily walk in the woods. Trying to be present with the magnificent. The trees, the shrubbery ,the dirt, the sky, the silence. But she wouldn't stop harassing me and I could not hear her answer about what she wanted. It wasn't until I was on the way back to my house that I heard a tiny, distant voice calling.

I said, "Mighty Worrier is that you?"
She answered in a very low whisper with a heavy tone "Yes"
I asked "What do you want from me? Why are you here? What can I do for you?"
Her answer came quickly and simply "Be present"

Hmmmm. Of course that is easier said than done. But, yes of course. She is here to remind me to become present. But how?

Well, I have the option of Coming to My Senses. I'm sure you've heard that admonition before. "Child, come to your senses!" But what does that really mean. Well, it means what it says.


Sitting at my desk writing this

I see trees, computer, photos, paintings, window, flowers, walls, phone, plate with olives
I taste olives, garlic, rosemary
I smell dog, cannabis, tobacco, olives, mold, shampoo,
I hear tapping of the keys, hum of the computer, music in the distance, my breathing, dog snoring
I feel my ass in the chair , my feet crossed,  the cold air, my fat belly, my tense shoulders

I have come to my senses and that gives me access to my 6th sense. My sense of humor! HA!

I ask myself "HOW'S YOUR NOW?" And right at this very moment. Everything right here is all right. That's the truth.

Don Miguel Ruiz says "There are only 3 truths: Life, Death and NOW"


And I eat a piece of chocolate. That's all.

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Happy Birthday to my Mom Shelly Glaser who would be 77 today! Soft Cover Book Now Available!

My mother was born on this day in 1939. So that would make her 77 today. Lucky 7's. In honor of her Virgo Birth our soft cover book, THE FIRST PRACTICAL HANDBOOK FOR CRAZY PEOPLE is now available for purchase on IndieBound and Amazon or directly through my website 

It is on days like these that I wish my mother was here on earth with me. First I'd call her up and tell her all about it and then we'd probably go out to dinner somewhere in Carmel California where she spent the last 25 years of her life before moving to an assisted living facility in L.A.

I know we would embrace and delight over the controversial cover and the compelling contents, a combination of both our lives and our triumph over the devastation of mental illness. Both of us finding joy, success, happiness, tears and lots of laughs as we'd reflect on the tumultuous journey of our lives.

Of course my father, Norm Glaser, her one true love, would also be present and "kvelling" (so proud) over our mutual accomplishment. He would no doubt pick up the check.

But, alas, they are both gone and I sit here with you dear audience to share this momentous occasion. Seeing our book in print and now able to share with the world is something she asked me insure would happen. Her last wish.

Well, mom, as you blow out those heavenly birthday candles today, just know, your last wish came true.

Wednesday, August 31, 2016


   I find my head swimming in circles these days. Sometimes I'm drowning in my own crazy haze of grey matter but for the past two weeks the Mendocino Coast has been fogged in so I was also surrounded by solid gray matter. It's borderline depressing and many folks are affected by SAD. But, I'm learning to catch more waves of joy, surprise, chance and good stuff. Throw myself a lifeline. Still, sometimes, in the dark I can get consumed with worry over debt, money, health, fear,violence, extinction, etc,etc...

Today, the sun, literally, came out.

The blinding, glorious, opulent, generous and infinite sun. I basked. I understood why many cultures began their religions with Sun Worship. I went to the beach. It wasn't the usual brisk 60 degrees with north winds blowing my mind.  It was warm (77 degrees maybe?) and sunny, not a cloud in the sky. Spectacular! Tons of driftwood stood sanctified in sculptures.

 Even surrounded by this exquisite nature my mind still whirred, swerved, clicked and clucked. I put my bare feet into the very cold pacific and squeaked with the thrill of it and then I walked down the beach splashing in the gentle easy tide.

 They say that you bathe in negative ions near and in the Pacific. Negative ions improves you mood, releases stress and smells so damn good. They even make negative ion machines that you can buy to improve your circumstances, but the great green and blue wide ocean provides.

 I Met two lovely strangers in from Chico, (originally from Israel) and after a short introduction spontaneously told them about my disappearing husband, who vanished almost 20 years ago. I don't know exactly why I told them that story. I think we were talking about the pitfalls of marriage and possible consequences therein, so I mentioned it, (or maybe I'm just weird, a little bit crazy with all this mercury in retrograde and dawning solar eclipse coming this Thursday to a solar system near you). We parted ways after the lovely gent of the couple gave me a small sticker with the image of the Buddha which said, "suffering sucks". I took that as my cue to meditate.

It's difficult for me to meditate, but according to the FIRST PRACTICAL HANDBOOK FOR CRAZY PEOPLE written by me and my mom, it's one of the most PRACTICAL things you can do to calm the fuck down. Most meditation specialists say you are required to practice 20 minutes of meditation each session, but just the pressure of that alone prevents me from meditation. My mother and I feel like starting with one minute of meditation is enough. We find that one minute, (clocked on the stop watch on your phone) of full meditation and total body relaxation can change your world. But Hey! It's even hard to keep my mind quiet for even ONE MINUTE! (One minute of peace please).

One needs a really good Mantra to meditate. One needs a Mantra you can't argue with or subdue in anyway.

I have been through a couple of mantras during my time here on earth. The first was given to me in 1973 when I was 13 by Maharishi Mahesh Yogi and it was a "nonsense" word so it did little to distract me from my much more exhilarating pubescent train of thought. After that I stopped meditating for 20 years. Then I tried OM. That really didn't do it either. I couldn't keep track of my in and out breaths with OM because of the closed mouth formation. And my mind was no match for it so that didn't last long for me.

Now, at the age of 56, I have discovered the perfect Mantra: One that is amazingly successful at quieting my mind. It may be one of the oldest sounds in the world if not the most comforting. It's probably one of the first sounds we hear out of our mothers mouths. There is nothing better to calm my mind and soul.

I'm going to share it with you now...
Say it with me now
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh you can finish the breath with little sh sh shhh's
Just continue the Shhhhh until the breath is completely out and you'll know when it is.
Try this for one minute and increase amount of time when and if you want to do so.

I love talking about my mother and the release of our book,THE FIRST PRACTICAL HANDBOOK FOR CRAZY PEOPLE  at this Virgo time of year. My mother's birthday is on the 6th of September. She would have been 77 but she passed in 2010. She still stays in touch.

Spoiler alert: Part of my mother's mental illness gave her delusions of being the Virgin Mary (Virgo related as well) and so I thought the last piece of driftwood I saw today as I was leaving the beach was a perfect example of the magic of being crazy like me and my mother. She was watching over me the whole time I was there.

 I feel this ultimate celebration of her life with the release of the book!!  It's now on AmazonKindle at a very reasonable price and the softcover comes out at my book launch at the Gallery Bookshop in the Mendocino Village on Friday September 23rd.  Thanks for tuning in.